The Silent Treatment

If you have children, you've had this feeling before.  You're on the computer, or cleaning up the house, or you finally got a chance to sit down and relax when suddenly...it's way too quiet.  This kind of quiet is eerie.  It reminds me of a horror movie because you start to walk around the house to look for the kids and you don't know what to expect around the corner or what's going to to jump out at you as you open the door.  Let me tell you about a couple of horror stories I experienced.


     For the last couple of months we have increased our efforts to potty train Sofia.  We have been successful for the most part, but of course we have had a few set backs and miscues.  Sofia is becoming more independent now and she takes pride in doing things on her own.  She  has her own Baby Bjorn training potty and also a training attachment for the toilet.  One morning I asked her to go potty, which is our normal morning routine.  Instead of using the "big girl" potty in the upstairs bathroom, she was adamant about using the "baby" potty downstairs.  I agreed and off she went.  I was busy getting Donovan dressed when I realized that she had been gone for a little while.  My "Spidey-sense" started to tingle because it was way too quiet.  I quietly walked downstairs to see what she was doing.  I walked in to the bathroom to see Sofia finishing her business.  She did her potty, wiped and was pulling up her skirt.  Awesome, right?  Wrong!

     Sofia is used to us being around to help when she goes potty.  Since we weren't there, she did everything herself, which includes disposing of the waste.  That's when I noticed it.  There was a giant turd in the sink!  "Why would she put the poop in the sink and not the toilet? How does such a small person have such a big bowel movement?",  I thought to myself.  My horror story turned into a comedy.  Think back to Caddyshack when Bill Murray's character had to fish the doody/Baby Ruth out of the pool.  I took a wipe and delicately picked up the King Size Baby Ruth and flushed it down the toilet.  It wasn't funny at the time but looking back on it, I can see the humor.


     Another story starts about the same way.  I sent the children upstairs to start getting ready for bed.  I was talking to Katherine and mid-sentence I thought, it's way too quiet.  I rushed upstairs searching room to room to find the kids.  I walked into the master bathroom to find Sofia with a pair of sheers cutting Donovan's hair!  Where did she find the sharpest scissors in the house?  How did she get him to stand so still and so quiet?  I quickly grabbed the scissors before she could do any more damage.  There were only a few locks of hair on the floor, so I thought I caught her in time.  As I began to comb Donovan's hair more and more hair began to fall to the floor.  Luckily Donovan has so much hair that it was hard to tell that his hair stylist is only 2 years old.

"Siblings are the people we practice on, the people who teach us about fairness and cooperation and kindness and caring, quite often the hard way"